College Counseling Connecticut: You are choosing your child’s peersBy Daryl CapuanoCollege Counseling
“Wait until you hear this…Joey wants to transfer because… there is too much partying.”
I had worked with Joey through our Student Mastery Program. He was a great kid from the perspective of someone who was with him an hour a week but I understand that his high energy would be a challenge to both teachers and parents who worked with him for many hours at a time.
Joey’s social life at Lyme-Old Lyme High School in Connecticut was great. He was one of the leaders of a group of guys who played sports and then “partied” on the weekends. While we were able to get him through high school with decent grades – despite his penchant for forgetting or perhaps “forgetting” his assignments, he now was on his own at college.
When we worked together for college counseling, Joey had two distinct themes: “fun” and “warm”. He ultimately chose a school in Florida where I will tell parents the students are not amateurs at having fun but are professional!
What do you think happens when you put a bunch of free-spirited 18 year olds together with barely any supervision?
You are choosing your child’s peer group more than anything in relation to college.
Joey had heard my warnings about students failing out or falling into drug/alcohol issues at colleges like the one he attended. He had matured a bit – which he was kind enough to credit to our conversations – and realized that being around many who smoked weed every day and viewed the weekend as Wednesday through Sunday was not a good environment for him. “I think I like being the fun guy amongst normal kids like in Old Lyme. I don’t like feeling I need to keep up with the wildest guys who are far crazier than me.”
We are working on his transfer applications now.